Have you ever been in a room full of people, people you know, and felt very alone? I do not like this feeling at all. I get in these situations where I feel like I should have something to say to somebody, but I can't think of anything. In my head, it seems as if everybody is talking to somebody and all I can do is stand there and try to smile. Pressure comes over me during these times and it is almost like a very mild panic attack inside my body.
I am an introvert, always have been, so that means I get my energy from being alone and having quiet time. This does not mean that I do not like to be around people. When I am with 1 or 2 friends, sometimes I feel like I can't stop talking. Since being a stay at home mom, I crave time to talk with my husband or other moms or just adults in general.
When I was in high school and college, people used to tell me they thought I was being "stuck up" or "snooty" because I wouldn't talk to people. I guess that is what I think now as an adult, that if I don't talk to people they are going to think I am being rude and I really am not trying to be.
Does anybody else experience this or is it just me?
Yes. I can relate to every word you wrote. It gets better with time, I think. Now, I try to seek out others who look "alone in the crowd," and introduce myself, further conversation usually takes place. This is not natural/easy for me, but it often feels better just trying. However, sometimes I just slip out the door and go home.
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