Throughout the whole process of not getting pregnant the passed 3 years, I thought I had learned the lesson - I am not in control when it comes to having a baby..God is. No matter how much I plan, calculate, etc God has the ultimate say so in whether or not we have a baby or not. Got it!
Or, maybe not...
Recently, my husband and I have been looking into the idea of adopting a child. My thoughts: "we are good parents, we already have one child who is smart and well-behaved, so of course they will want to give us a child"
We went to an adoption orientation for a local agency. Our idea was that we would adopt a 2-5 year old. The lady began the session by telling us that if weren't adopting a child 8 years old or older, a sibling group of 3 or more, or doing the foster to adopt program then our chances of getting a child the ages we wanted were very slim.
So, I began to think, "Maybe we should to the foster to adopt" "Maybe we should adopt older"
I am so thankful for my husband, he could see my wheels turning and he turned and said to me, "We will not be fostering any children because that would be too hard on Lilly. We will fill out the application as we planned and then we will leave the rest to God."
It was a breath of fresh air to me. Exactly what I needed to hear, through my husband
God had to remind me that having another child - through adoption or biologically - either way, it is still up to God!