Have you ever had something about you be the same for so long that you didn't really notice God changing you? For so long, my profession, my heart, my everything has been about children. I wanted to be a teacher from 6th grade on (maybe earlier). I worked with children all through middle school, high school and college - baby-sitting, nursery, teaching, tutoring, etc. When I graduated college, I began teaching right away - taught kindergarten, 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th grade during my 9 year span. When I had my daughter, I began teaching the children's Sunday School class at our church. I figured that is where my gifts are, that is my passion...right? Well, recently I have realized I hadn't been so passionate about teaching Sunday School - not that I don't love the children and want to serve them and teach them Christ's love for them, but I just haven't been excited about doing it.
A close friend was telling me about how a lot of times the "struggles and trials" we have been through become our passion. God uses those to allow us to help others and encourage others b/c we've been through it and came out the other side. Well, as she was telling me this I was thinking what has been my struggle or my trial? I thought of 2.
1) My marriage! I mean, not now - right now it is pretty great and my husband and I praise God often, but at the beginning it was pretty rough. We started out as two non-Christians who were basically sharing an apartment. We didn't consult the other on anything - we didn't communicate very well at all and we fought constantly. God brought us so far in teaching us, through HIS word about how to treat each other. He taught me how to be submissive to my husband (which doesn't mean letting my husband walk all over me or beat me or any of the "negative" things some people think when they hear the word submissive) and how to let him lead our family. The Lord also taught my husband how to love me and be more sensitive to my needs and my desires. Because we had a rough marriage for about 4 years, I can relate through those wives who are struggling in their marriage, I have a heart for those women who want "out" because I was there.
2) Being a mother! I really struggled in the transition from being a working wife to being a stay at home mother. I knew it was what I needed to do and it was best for my daughter, but it took a lot of prayer and a lot of struggle to get to where I was content with this new "job" that God had called me to do.
So, my passions have changed. I am passionate about helping women who are struggling in these areas and providing encouragement for them because, like I said, I have been there. I am not so sure what specific ministry God wants me to be a part of in order to use these struggles to help others, but I am keeping my eyes open.
I will go, Lord, if you lead me. I will follow you!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Setting an Example
I've tried various methods of cleaning my house, but the one that seems to work the best for me now is this:
Monday - laundry (all), general cleaning from the weekend
Tuesday - Bathrooms and gather trash
Wednesday - Dust
Thursday - vacuume and mop and laundry (just clothes)
Friday - catch up day - grocery shopping
I am thankful that I have a husband who isn't overly concerned with whether the dishes get washed each day or if the floors got mopped that week because sometimes I am really slack in my household chores. The thing I have realized lately though, is that I am setting an example for my daughter, not only with what I am doing, but with the attitude I do it with. She has started commenting on the fact that I need to do ALL those dishes in the sink. I usually reluctantly say, "I know, I know, I'll do them soon"
If I want her to do her jobs the right way, all the way and in a nice way - then I need to do mine that way as well.
Lilly's Jobs:
Clearing and setting the table.
Wiping the table.
Moving the trash can to the back after the trash man comes.
Putting the silverware away.
Folding the wash cloths.
So, as I learned in the Frazzled Female study this past semester, I will make a list of the things I think need to be done that day and pray over it. If it isn't important to God that I get it done then I pray He will let me know so that I only do what He wants me to that day. All the rest, I pray He will allow me to do with a cheerful heart.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Blueberries
A few days ago, some friends and I took our children blueberry picking. My daughter and I went last year and the blueberries we picked lasted us a good 9 months, so I was excited to go back and do the same thing this year. It was very warm outside by the time we made it to the farm (here in Texas it gets like that :) ) so I think all of us moms had similar thoughts - lets just pick the blueberries, fill our buckets, and get to where the a/c is.
Our children, on the other hand, had different ideas. They wanted to eat the blueberries and run in and around the rows. As moms, we kept saying, "Don't eat them, pick them." But, how could we expect them to resist the temptation of eating a delicious blueberry that was right in front of their face? Could I resist a temptation like that?
Were they wrong? I don't think so....
The moms knew we were trying to prepare for the future, have blueberries to eat for later.
The children were enjoying the experience, enjoying what God had provided at the moment.
I know I can learn from the children and remember to stop and enjoy the moments we are given at the time. :)
Our children, on the other hand, had different ideas. They wanted to eat the blueberries and run in and around the rows. As moms, we kept saying, "Don't eat them, pick them." But, how could we expect them to resist the temptation of eating a delicious blueberry that was right in front of their face? Could I resist a temptation like that?
Were they wrong? I don't think so....
The moms knew we were trying to prepare for the future, have blueberries to eat for later.
The children were enjoying the experience, enjoying what God had provided at the moment.
I know I can learn from the children and remember to stop and enjoy the moments we are given at the time. :)
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
I Am A Creature of Habit
I like schedules and I like doing things the way I've always done them. Change is hard for me, but once the change is made, I can adapt.
My husband recently got a new position at work which requires him to travel quite a bit for different lengths of time in each place.
Plus side is: he gets equal time on and off - so if he is gone for 2 weeks, he gets 2 weeks off when he returns. :)
Down side: There is no schedule of when he is going on these various trips so we really can't plan any trips in advance because we don't know when he'll be home or when he'll be out of town. :(
It is a recent change and for the most part I have adapted pretty well so far to all the "uncertainties" that have come with this new position, except for my quiet time with God. I used to wake up with my husband at 4:30am and make his lunch, have my quiet time while he was getting ready for work, and then go back to sleep until my daughter woke up. Now, I no longer have to get up at 4:30 to make his lunch so I have to figure out when to have my quiet time.
This is definately a test of my faith because when I got up before it was because my husband needed me to make his lunch. God doesn't "need" me to spend time with Him, I NEED to spend time with Him. I pray the Lord will give me the desire to wake up early and spend that time with Him every day no matter what the "schedule" is.
My husband recently got a new position at work which requires him to travel quite a bit for different lengths of time in each place.
Plus side is: he gets equal time on and off - so if he is gone for 2 weeks, he gets 2 weeks off when he returns. :)
Down side: There is no schedule of when he is going on these various trips so we really can't plan any trips in advance because we don't know when he'll be home or when he'll be out of town. :(
It is a recent change and for the most part I have adapted pretty well so far to all the "uncertainties" that have come with this new position, except for my quiet time with God. I used to wake up with my husband at 4:30am and make his lunch, have my quiet time while he was getting ready for work, and then go back to sleep until my daughter woke up. Now, I no longer have to get up at 4:30 to make his lunch so I have to figure out when to have my quiet time.
This is definately a test of my faith because when I got up before it was because my husband needed me to make his lunch. God doesn't "need" me to spend time with Him, I NEED to spend time with Him. I pray the Lord will give me the desire to wake up early and spend that time with Him every day no matter what the "schedule" is.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Getting Fed
Here are some ways that I make sure I am getting spiritually fed:
* I sign up for a ladies Bible study at a local church. It is great to meet with other ladies who stay at home during the day, most of them have young children like I do, and discuss God's Word. Another plus to this is that they have child care and so my daughter goes to her class, learns about God's Word while she interacts with other children. She loves it and so do I!
* About a year ago, I came across the idea of having an on-line accountabilty group from a blog called Women Living Well. So, I got a group of Christian ladies together that I have met all through my life and we started posting on FB what we were reading in God's Word and our thoughts and prayer requests. The group has changed over time, but it has been monumental in me having my quiet time each day. I don't think any of the ladies know how much they have blessed me by holding me accountable for my time in the Word.
* Recently, I started a Prayer Playdate group. This is a way to have moms get together to pray over their children, but to also focus on teaching our children about prayer too. When we meet, 2 moms go off to pray while the others do activities with the kids and then we switch. Then, after the moms are finished praying together, we pray as a group with the kids. It is so neat to see the kids react to hearing you say their name in prayer. :)
* Going to church on Sunday is a given. God tells us to gather together with other believers.
* Studying my lessons to teach in Sunday School. Have you heard the saying that when you teach something you learn it much better? That is so true for me, knowing I have to teach a certain lesson to a group of 3rd-5th graders, really makes me focus and study God's Word.
* I read a lot of non-fiction books that talk about how to become a better woman of God or how to use your resources more wisely, etc. Some of my favorites are Next Door Savior by Max Lucado, A Woman's High Calling by Elizabeth George and Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow. All great books!
How do you stay spiritually fed?
* I sign up for a ladies Bible study at a local church. It is great to meet with other ladies who stay at home during the day, most of them have young children like I do, and discuss God's Word. Another plus to this is that they have child care and so my daughter goes to her class, learns about God's Word while she interacts with other children. She loves it and so do I!
* About a year ago, I came across the idea of having an on-line accountabilty group from a blog called Women Living Well. So, I got a group of Christian ladies together that I have met all through my life and we started posting on FB what we were reading in God's Word and our thoughts and prayer requests. The group has changed over time, but it has been monumental in me having my quiet time each day. I don't think any of the ladies know how much they have blessed me by holding me accountable for my time in the Word.
* Recently, I started a Prayer Playdate group. This is a way to have moms get together to pray over their children, but to also focus on teaching our children about prayer too. When we meet, 2 moms go off to pray while the others do activities with the kids and then we switch. Then, after the moms are finished praying together, we pray as a group with the kids. It is so neat to see the kids react to hearing you say their name in prayer. :)
* Going to church on Sunday is a given. God tells us to gather together with other believers.
* Studying my lessons to teach in Sunday School. Have you heard the saying that when you teach something you learn it much better? That is so true for me, knowing I have to teach a certain lesson to a group of 3rd-5th graders, really makes me focus and study God's Word.
* I read a lot of non-fiction books that talk about how to become a better woman of God or how to use your resources more wisely, etc. Some of my favorites are Next Door Savior by Max Lucado, A Woman's High Calling by Elizabeth George and Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow. All great books!
How do you stay spiritually fed?
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Matthew 7:12
The scripture verse that I am teaching my daughter this week is Matthew 7:12 or as some may call it the Golden Rule. "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and Prophets"
I think I tend to get this backwards a lot of times - I think that if that is how people treat me, that must be how they want to be treated. Do you ever do that?
For example, I think if somebody doesn't acknowledge me when I see them somewhere, then they must not want to talk to me - so I say nothing.
Or, if somebody keeps refusing invitations to my house or to "hang out" with me or my family then they must not want to spend time with us, so I should just leave them alone.
This isn't what the scripture says though, it says to do to others what you want them to do to You! I have been stressing this to Lilly this week. It doesn't mean they will treat you the way you want to be treated, but at least you will be doing what Jesus tells us to do.
So, I need to acknowledge that person I know walking down the street, be bold and have conversations with people I want to get to know better, invite others over, and share Jesus' love with others even when it seems like they don't "deserve" it.
We never know somebody's situation and why they are the way they are...I love the way this song reminds us of that...
I think I tend to get this backwards a lot of times - I think that if that is how people treat me, that must be how they want to be treated. Do you ever do that?
For example, I think if somebody doesn't acknowledge me when I see them somewhere, then they must not want to talk to me - so I say nothing.
Or, if somebody keeps refusing invitations to my house or to "hang out" with me or my family then they must not want to spend time with us, so I should just leave them alone.
This isn't what the scripture says though, it says to do to others what you want them to do to You! I have been stressing this to Lilly this week. It doesn't mean they will treat you the way you want to be treated, but at least you will be doing what Jesus tells us to do.
So, I need to acknowledge that person I know walking down the street, be bold and have conversations with people I want to get to know better, invite others over, and share Jesus' love with others even when it seems like they don't "deserve" it.
We never know somebody's situation and why they are the way they are...I love the way this song reminds us of that...
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
I Don't Want to Think About it Anymore!
It consumes my thoughts and I can't take it anymore! Ever since my daughter was about one, my husband and I started talking about having another baby. I learned (or so I thought) from the period of time we spent "trying" to conceive her that we are not in control and it will happen in God's perfect timing. So, we just stopped preventing.
About a year ago, I was reading about the building of the tabernacle in the Bible and I came to this idea that God has designed things to work in a specific way. He designed a woman's body to give birth and He designed conception to happen a certain way, so I decided to take a little more action in getting to know my body. I used fertility monitors and I went to doctors and they said that everything is normal with my body. Then, I began to really get discouraged and I tried to figure out why God was not allowing us to have another child - were we supposed to adopt? would I not be able to handle another child? maybe we couldn't financially afford another child? would my daughter react badly to having a sibling? The questions go on and on.
I went to another doctor, secretly I went because I was thinking there is something wrong and I just want her to tell me what it is and that I can't have anymore children. Several of my friends recommended this doctor so I was excited about the appointment. Well, she gave me some options - neither of which are right for me and also gave me a "plan" to use over the next 6 months. This brought me to my tears - I do not want to go on a fertility drug, I do not want to "plan" when to be intimate with my husband, I do not want to think about this anymore!
Recently, I started reading the book Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow - excellent book about being content and trusting in God's faithfulness to lead even when you don't feel like He's doing the right thing. So humbling! This book got me thinking about where I am and the moments I was missing out on b/c I was so focused on having another child.
Also, I talked with a friend who asked me, "Can you be content with just having one child?" "Can you be content with the blessings He has for you now?" I didn't know how to respond, my head says sure I can, I know there is a possibility God may not ever give us another child, but my heart hurts when I think of that.
Not too long ago, I also spoke with my mom about the book I was reading and about this situation - she reminded me of the Israelites desiring to have a king and God told them they didn't need a king - He was enough for them. They still continued to ask and so God relented to giving them a king. Well, I certainly do not want God to give me something that isn't in my best interest and isn't in His will for me.
So, I have relinquished this to My Father in Heaven, who knows I still desire to have another child, but more so I desire to walk the path He is leading me in. I am not going to continue to pray for another child, and those of you who I have asked to pray for me to have another child - I ask you to change your prayer that I would be content and joyful and excited to be a daughter of the King and to relish in the blessings He has given me and to continue to remember how far He has brought me.
About a year ago, I was reading about the building of the tabernacle in the Bible and I came to this idea that God has designed things to work in a specific way. He designed a woman's body to give birth and He designed conception to happen a certain way, so I decided to take a little more action in getting to know my body. I used fertility monitors and I went to doctors and they said that everything is normal with my body. Then, I began to really get discouraged and I tried to figure out why God was not allowing us to have another child - were we supposed to adopt? would I not be able to handle another child? maybe we couldn't financially afford another child? would my daughter react badly to having a sibling? The questions go on and on.
I went to another doctor, secretly I went because I was thinking there is something wrong and I just want her to tell me what it is and that I can't have anymore children. Several of my friends recommended this doctor so I was excited about the appointment. Well, she gave me some options - neither of which are right for me and also gave me a "plan" to use over the next 6 months. This brought me to my tears - I do not want to go on a fertility drug, I do not want to "plan" when to be intimate with my husband, I do not want to think about this anymore!
Recently, I started reading the book Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow - excellent book about being content and trusting in God's faithfulness to lead even when you don't feel like He's doing the right thing. So humbling! This book got me thinking about where I am and the moments I was missing out on b/c I was so focused on having another child.
Also, I talked with a friend who asked me, "Can you be content with just having one child?" "Can you be content with the blessings He has for you now?" I didn't know how to respond, my head says sure I can, I know there is a possibility God may not ever give us another child, but my heart hurts when I think of that.
Not too long ago, I also spoke with my mom about the book I was reading and about this situation - she reminded me of the Israelites desiring to have a king and God told them they didn't need a king - He was enough for them. They still continued to ask and so God relented to giving them a king. Well, I certainly do not want God to give me something that isn't in my best interest and isn't in His will for me.
So, I have relinquished this to My Father in Heaven, who knows I still desire to have another child, but more so I desire to walk the path He is leading me in. I am not going to continue to pray for another child, and those of you who I have asked to pray for me to have another child - I ask you to change your prayer that I would be content and joyful and excited to be a daughter of the King and to relish in the blessings He has given me and to continue to remember how far He has brought me.
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